Broken Fast

Thursday after Ash Wednesday

Put your trust in the Lord and do good;
dwell in the land and feed on its riches. Psalm 37:3

I finally give in to a handful of pretzels. Typically I enjoy a fast day. I like the prayerfulness of it, the tug that comes at me during the odd hours when I begin to reach for something to eat and then become mindful of my want and step away from it. I appreciate the reminder of how easily I assuage my desires as I am in the act of setting them aside. I enjoy the longing and the simplicity a fast brings.

But this time my need for sustenance wins out over the spiritual discipline. At least I’m choosing pretzels, I think. After all, they are a Lenten tradition. And I am mindful about eating them. I count five into my hand, and munch them slowly, deliberately. I do not try to consume them surreptitiously, pretending they don’t count. Nor do I judge myself for breaking my fast. It is what it is.

Even in the wilderness abundance awaits discovery. God sustains us on every journey. Sometimes that sustenance is more obvious than at other times. I have just stepped onto the Lenten path to discover that already there are riches to be found along the way. In fasting and in mindful eating. In giving up and in taking in. In trusting in God and in trusting in God. And in trusting in God.

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